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Mom Truths…Adjusting to Life With 2

Baby Boy #2 decided to come one week early on his own.  He was 8 pounds 9 ounces and 21 ½ inches long.pic1lifewith2

I fell in LOVE at first sight.  And he looked so much like his brother, that I felt déjà vu.  {Did I have the same baby all over again?!!} 

While pregnant, I wondered what it was going to be like with a newborn and a 2.75 year old.  Many friends with multiple children told me that the transition from one to two was the toughest for them.  pic2lifewith2

This sweet baby came home and ROCKED his big brother’s world.  It’s been two months and things are still kind of CRAZY!  The baby has been the easy one, it’s the 2 year old that’s the challenge.

So here’s a glimpse into my new crazy life with 2…

  •  I am tired.  With a newborn, who isn’t tired?! The idea of “sleep while the baby sleeps,” sounds great in theory, but it doesn’t work when you have a toddler running around.   Plus there is laundry to do and a pile of dishes in the sink. We are starting to get some 4 to 5 hour sleep stretches at night.  I’m holding out hope for more sleep again someday!
  • My toddler acts up.  Since the baby came home, the big brother is pretty much doing everything we tell him not to do… jumping on the furniture, throwing toys, kicking at the dog, running around yelling “Go away baby” and overall just not listening.  Plus, his nap times have not been going very smoothly.  He was jumping off the toddler bed one day while I was changing the baby’s diaper, so I asked, “What are you doing???!!!!”  His response, “I’m driving you nuts!”  {This is true, but I’d better watch my mouth!}  I feel horrible on days when it seems like every word out of my mouth is “NO”.  I will be honest, I am STRUGGLING with how to discipline him.
  • Our TV is on a lot.  Mickey Mouse Club House is the current favorite.  Luckily, we have a bazillion episodes saved on the DVR.  I feel bad about all the TV time, but it is very helpful when trying to get things done like feed the baby, wash bottles and prepare lunch.  He doesn’t just sit and stare at the TV.  Most of the time he’s standing and playing at the train table too.  And he learns from Mickey!  I mean, I wasn’t the one who taught him what an octagon is!   Don’t worry about too much screen time and not enough exercise.  This boy is one of the busiest you’ll ever meet!
  • I sent my toddler to preschool.  I had been home with both boys for one week, when my husband said, “When can we send him to preschool?”  I said, “Not soon enough!”  We quickly arranged two mornings a week.  This was the best idea my husband ever had!  I don’t know who loves it more, me or the kid!
  • I shower every other day…usually.  It is hard to find time for something as simple as a shower now that there are two.  So now I take my showers on the weekend when my husband is home and on Tuesday and Thursday mornings during preschool time.
  • I am formula feeding.  I was an exclusive pumper with my first.  I decided to try breast-feeding again this time.  I thought with a different baby, maybe it would work.  It didn’t.  The nurses had me try a nipple shield.  It was AWFUL.  I found pumping to be next to impossible.  It is double the time pumping and bottle-feeding.  I don’t have that kind of time when a toddler is bouncing off the walls.  Formula was the solution for my sanity!
  • I LOVE my little boys more than anything.  The past 2.75 years have been the best of my life.  I am thankful for healthy, beautiful boys.  Yes, there are hard times, days when I’ve cried and days when my toddler is “driving me nuts,” but the boys have truly filled my life full of love and laughter.

I have to wonder, is this how it goes for everyone?

I’m really not sure if this transition is rougher on the toddler or the mom.   One thing that is for sure, they won’t always be this little crying for a bottle or pleading, “mommy play with me.”

So even though it’s CRAZY, I’m trying to cherish ALL of the moments with my little monsters!  pic3lifewith2

 

Question for all the experienced mommies: How did you survive the transition to 2 kids?  How long will it take the oldest to get used to the new sibling?

 

 

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13 Responses to Mom Truths…Adjusting to Life With 2

  1. Robyn Rasmussen March 26, 2014 at 7:17 am #

    Great advice… sounds so much like my own adjustment time with two boys! Hang in there mommy it will soon get much easier! Ps I Love! That newborn photo I’m assuming you took?

    • Shari
      Shari March 26, 2014 at 9:31 am #

      Thanks Robyn!! Yes, I took the newborn photo myself!!

  2. Kaitlyn
    Kaitlyn March 26, 2014 at 10:19 am #

    Love your post today, Shari!! No worries…I’m still lucky to get a shower in every other day!! Hang in there… you’re doing your best and it will get better!

    • Shari
      Shari March 26, 2014 at 1:47 pm #

      Thanks Kaitlyn! Funny how showers become a luxury!! 🙂

  3. Jennifer March 26, 2014 at 10:31 am #

    I really enjoyed your post! I have a 6 week old and a 2 year old and can relate to a lot of what you mentioned!

    • Shari
      Shari March 26, 2014 at 1:48 pm #

      Jennifer, thank you! It’s nice to know we are not alone in this experience! Good luck to you!

  4. Sarah March 26, 2014 at 3:13 pm #

    This is a very interesting post since my husband and I periodically talk about having another baby. Our daughter is 19-months now and we have had people asking about us having a second as soon as we were out of the hospital! I haven’t been too keen on a second since the first labor went bad (emergency c-section after 30+ hours of non-medicated labor) and knowing we will be able to give a more comfortable life to one child compared to two. Decisions decisions…

  5. Shari
    Shari March 26, 2014 at 3:37 pm #

    Sarah, Yes it is a big decision! Don’t do it until you think you’re ready! Figuring out how to juggle life with a toddler & a baby has proved to be a challenge, but I would do it again. I mean have #2, not 3! 🙂 Good luck in your decision & do what is right for your family!

  6. Esther March 27, 2014 at 11:38 am #

    I completely understand how you feel. My husband and I just had our 3rd little boy. Our first two were about 30 months apart (which, in retrospect, wasn’t too bad at all), and our 2nd and 3rd are only 14 months apart (which has been very difficult). So that means that we have a just turned 4 year old, 17 month old and 12 week old….it was and still is constant chaos at our home. 🙂 hang in there!

    • Shari
      Shari March 27, 2014 at 12:02 pm #

      Thanks for understanding Esther! We will all hang in there together!!

  7. Ashley November 21, 2014 at 9:17 am #

    Oh my…I am pretty sure I have written this same article in my head. Pretty much exactly how I feel and exactly how life with two little boys is going! So much mom guilt…yet we are alll surviving, fed, ,and mostly clean. And, despite all of the lack of listening from number 1 and the lack of sleep brought on my #2 our home is still filled with love. Hang in there! As my mom always says “this to shall pass” and my mother in law once said “little kids, little problems. Big kids, big problems.”

  8. Rachel February 26, 2015 at 2:50 pm #

    Great post! I have a 2.5 year old boy and little brother is due in just 6 weeks.

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