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Housewife and Loving Life: Gender Roles Work for Me

A Man’s Man with Skills

I fully expect my husband to be a man’s man. I want him to work hard all day, and cherish and protect me like I was his most prized possession. I wish for him to have an overwhelming desire to ravish me all the time and do all the driving. In between all those things, I want him to help with the kids, not act helpless with household chores, and be super considerate about my ever-changing feelings on everything, from what kind of trees we should plant to current events. He just needs to do it all, at the right time, in the right place, every single day of his life.

Be right back, I gotta go rub a lamp…

I adore even his failed attempts at romantic gestures and he doesn’t even have to try to make me happy; he just does because he’s on Earth and he’s mine. *Swoon.*

A Woman’s Woman with Grit

I am a woman’s woman in a non-model, non-athletic sense. I’ve had three children. I’ve endured  uncontrollable fluctuating weight, hair loss, terrible skin, etc. I live and work from home in the country, therefore getting to the gym or salon would require some strategic planning and a bat signal! I’m a no-makeup, work from home, always barefoot, babies on my hip, boogers in my hair, muddy dogs following me around, what-are-these-skinny-jeans-you-speak-of kind of mom.

why traditional gender roles works well for me in my marriage

I do require a healthy dose of dependency on my husband, but I’m tough. I’ve held down the fort all by myself and I’ve been known to ward off an intrusive groundhog with a golf club, so you won’t find a fearful or soft spoken girl over here. I don’t have time to work out or tan or strut around in sports bras like I used do… in another life. Ha! I do however have quite a domestic reign (think 1950’s housewife) and enjoy things like cooking from scratch, meal planning, and doting on my family. I don’t go weak-at-the-knees over clothes or shoes, but will over some baby farm animals or special meat locker cuts!

Playing the Woman Card

And oh, how I love wearing my apron! It has hound dogs on it! I would take a dog over any traditional spouse gift, such as jewelry. I do sometimes get a wild hair and will go get a spray tan or my hair done to doll up just for my husband, because he deserves it and it reminds me that although I’ll never be 100% satisfied with my post-baby, biscuit-lovin’ body, it has value and deserves respect and some pampering. Plus, if that gives him a boost and scores me an unexpected date night, I’m all for it. It’s really no different than when I get his favorite ice cream for him. I actually think he likes the ice cream better, and I’m totally fine with that, too. Wink.

Also, you can bet your back end that I play the stereotypical woman/wife card to get out of stuff all. the. time. Heavy stuff needs brought up from storage? “Honey, I’m too little and weak to carry this!” Trash needs taken out? “Hey baby, I can make you feel like a man… take out the trash, please.” And he does the same thing! I swear on my kid’s homework that he purposely folds laundry all wonky because he knows I will say, “Let me fold those, dear.” Or if something drops, he will wait just a second longer to see if I bend over to pick it up, taking advantage of a little butt-grab. (I do the same to him. Butt-grabbing is gender neutral.)

Knowing that I provide and care for my family in some of the best ways I know how and enjoy it empowers me, even if they are considered stereotypical and menial tasks. 

How do you and your partner divide up responsibilities in your house? Are you more traditional or egalitarian?


 

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One Response to Housewife and Loving Life: Gender Roles Work for Me

  1. Val - Corn, Beans, Pigs & Kids April 3, 2018 at 4:52 pm #

    Amen. This made me smile and laugh because I’m right there with you!

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